Monday, August 10, 2009

Warning

Foul language ahead.

What happens when you sew full speed ahead on something you know how to sew? What happens when you don't bother to read the directions because hey, they're BWOF and mostly inexplicable anyway? And besides, you know what you're doing?

What happens?

****** PROFANITY ALERT **********

A clusterfuck of epic proportions, that's what happens

****** END PROFANITY ************

Mario's jacket is no longer with us. It met an undignified end this evening and ended up in the trash. I was too mad at myself to even take pictures before it was bundled away in black plastic.

So what did I do? Remember that nice collar I showed you, the one approved by Lily the cat? Well, if I'd bothered to read the directions and think beyond the last thing I made, I would have remembered to not to sew all the sides together because then I couldn't sew it into the facing properly.

Of course I didn't, so tonight I pinned the collar down, pinned the facing, sewed it all together, pressed the seam, clipped the seam, turned it right side out, pressed it again, and then actually looked at it.

It doesn't matter how long you've been sewing, how much experience you have, how many jackets you've made before. At least GLANCE AT THE FREAKING DIRECTIONS because otherwise your hubris will bite you in the ass.

I'm going to take my recently returned mojo out back and shoot it.

26 comments:

Faye Lewis said...

I like your profanity alert! So sorry that happened to you.

Rachel said...

I have found that I have more trouble sewing a pattern that I have done before.

Nancy K said...

I have to agree with Rachel I make more mistakes in patterns I've made before than in new ones. It just shows that one should never get too cocky.

neighbourhood.gal said...

That sucks.

NancyDaQ said...

Ehh, I'm so sorry for your disaster. Been there, done that. It especially sucks when you're making a special garment.

Breathe deep, make something easy. Fortunately it's still hot out so you have plenty of time to recoup.

Sherril said...

Oh no Karen, say it isn't so! I'll mourn his jacket, it was going to be beautiful. I hope you aren't scared for life and can come to a full recovery and get back to the sewing machine soon.

Dawn said...

Dammit! Don't you hate it when you know exactly what to do and then you are wrong?!?!?!? I love profanity but love your ALERT even more. :) Move on, it's dead.

Elaray said...

It wasn't your fault. BWOF jacket collars are from hell. I suspect you have met what I have fondly named "The Freakin Collar".

Little Hunting Creek said...

This is just Burda toying with you. They do that occasionally, just to show who is boss. Take a deep breath and make something easy to get over it. I have made hubris-related mistakes many times. It comes with being experienced. We have experience so we can make more complicated mistakes

Marita said...

Little hunting creek put it very nicely, had to laugh:-) she's so right. Too bad though, the jacket would have been greatlooking.

Lisette M said...

Made me laugh! It is a constant battle, do I go on solo or do I peek at the instructions? I'm a chicken and always tend to look...

Michelle said...

I'm sorry to hear about the demise of the jacket. There is often profanity that comes from my sewing room. And banging. And possibly smoke. My husband will sometimes come to the door and ask "Are you taking that machine apart again?" And I have to answer "no, I'm just making a dress."

McVal said...

I swear in German quite a bit when I'm sewing. Mainly just stuff I remember from High school that I had to look up. It's the only German I've retained...
I'm sorry you had such a time with the jacket! Are you sure it couldn't be corrected? or reworked into something else?

Rose said...

Did you lie on the floor, kick your feet, and have a full-out temper tantrum? Or, is that something that only the inexperienced (mistakenly thinking they are getting experienced)do? The death of a garment is sad but it's over now.

Pam Erny said...

Been there...done that....too many times, LOL!

Carolyn (Diary of a Sewing Fanatic) said...

Okay thank you for that laugh! I needed that! And it's reminded me of why I don't sew when my mojo is no where to be found!

*soothing sounds as she pats your back* It's okay, there, there, the next garment will be spectacular!

Reethi said...

I'm sorry, I really do feel your pain, but your post cracked me up, especially the last bit about shooting your sewing mo-jo. What can I say - I have these moments often.

cidell said...

Bahahahaha!!

Meg said...

Me too baby, been there done that.

Bettina said...

Karen,
thank you for that. You made me laugh out loud, not AT you, but with you. Oh I can relate so very well. Sorry you had to wad the jacket.

Kathi Rank said...

I think we are all victims of some CF in the sewing room -- think of it this way....the sewing gods were just sending you a message (other than to be humble)...that jacket just wasn't meant to be - it would have gotten moths, or got caught in a seat belt so that you had to chose to cut the jacket or the seat belt, or as soon as you finished the masterpiece Mario would have gained or lost 50 pounds it would not fit. By not finishing the jacket he will be healthy, you won't have moths and your seat belts are safe.

Bettina said...

Oh yes, Kathi, so very very true!

Gretchen the Household Deity said...

Anytime I think I know what I'm doing, my sewing machine makes sure I know who's the boss. RIP jacket. The next one will be even better.

gwensews said...

But--here's the thing. It's in the trash, out of sight, out of mind. IT NEVER HAPPENED !!

Tany said...

Sorry this happened... I feel your pain

Kat said...

Oh gosh! I can relate. It happens when I'm feeling smug about things, like when I'm feeling like a super sewer or something. Then I make some disasterous boo boo and am humbled yet again.

A "clusterf*** of epic proportions"...I'm going to remember that phrase LOL.